Friday, October 8, 2010

WHO SHOT SAM? (#fridayflash)

Click play for some mood music

Edith saw him walk in to the roadhouse. The Wurlitzer blared what Wurlitzers usually blare as she sipped her scotch and adjusted her skirt.

He was alone. Then again, so was she, but this was her bar and she was out with friends so it was on the up and up. And plus, the only reason she was stag to begin with was she eighty-sixed Martin when she found out his bowling night was really a rum-and-coke night with some strumpet named Sally two towns away.

She noticed that he made a beeline for the phone booth. Edith wondered who he'ld be calling this late. That was shady enough. And what was with those clothes? This clyde couldn't wear a blazer?

He looked at his watch, approached the bar and got himself a hefty glass of Jack Daniels.

When he sat down at an empty table," Edith approached.

"May I?"

"Sure help yourself," he said. "The name is Sam..."

"Sam..." Edith repeated. "That's a good enough name."

He lit a Camel and Edith thought he was trying to be like Montgomery Clift. She stifled a laugh.

"Something wrong?" he asked her.

She didn't answer and motioned toward the phone booth, "What's with the phone call?"

Perplexed by the question, Sam said that he was checking in with some family. Edith figured that was the dumbest alibi she's ever heard. There was probably some wanted poster in some post office with this guy's mug on it.

"And what's with those threads, Sam? I mean Don'cha wanna meet a nice girl?"

"You're not a nice girl?" he asked, noticing now that her friends eyeballing them.

"Depends. You don't look like you go in for nice girls" Edith snapped.

"Say, are you writing a book?" he asked keeping his cool.

"As a matter of fact I am," she answered. "It called 'How to Spot a Stiff from a Mile Away."

"Girlie, you couldn't handle this stiff..."

"Oh, so you think I'm some sort of vulture, huh?" Edith said.

Sam took one last drag on that Camel, gave her a once over and exhaled. "No, Edith, I don't consider you a vulture," he said.

"I consider you something a vulture would eat..."

Walking three miles back to his broken down rig, Sam marveled at how things have changed and couldn't wait to be in bed next to his wife.

Art: "The Pick Up" by the amazing American artist Rafael DeSoto. His work can be seen here. Music: "Who Shot Sam" by Wanda Jackson. It can be downloaded here.


  1. Too bad a tall dark stranger isn't in edith's future (at least not tonight)! Well done Anthony - and the painting added just the right touch.

  2. That painting is gorgeous.

    Isn't it funny how the "pick-up" is usually just verbal sparring? This one leaves me wondering so much more about Sam and Edith. While reading I felt like I was in a dingy bar, watching to see who was watching me. Great atmosphere, Ant.

  3. great gritty to and fro dialogue

    marc nash

  4. It seems her charms just weren't going to work on Sam. Fantastic dialogue. The story was woven nicely about the artwork. You pick the best stuff.

  5. Great atmosphere in this one. Both these characters popped off the page. That Edith is one prickly broad, no? And yes, great pic. Peace...

  6. Cool atmosphere and dialog as always Anthony. Really liked Sam's comeback, "I consider you something a vulture would eat..."
    as well as the song and painting.

  7. I love that slam. Wonderful how having a lady at home gives one the perspective to brush off the bottom dwellers.

  8. It's no surprise, knowing your work, that these characters pop so well.

    With all the respect in the world, wouldn't Sam's last line work better if part of the paragraph above it? I thought for sure it was Edith's line. There are a couple of other very minor grammar things you could catch too.

    But hey. Great work as usual.

  9. Tasty slice. I'd have been a lot sweeter to that guy. Look at those hands...

  10. Ha! That has got to be the best come back ever. I agree with Linda - superb atmosphere in this, and the artwork, as usual, is the perfect touch.

  11. Jeez, is Edie a li'l PMS or what? Nice approach to her pick-up style. Can't understand how she's alone. ;)

    Great stuff, Anthony. Always a pleasure to read your work. Always.

  12. Loved the picture. Edith was a real charmer. And Sam, good thing he can handle himself. LOL

  13. The picture sets such a great backdrop for the story.
    Loved the dialogue; such a strong character with an awesome parting line.
    Adam B @revhappiness

  14. Is this a familiar Sam? I liked him snapping back and asking if she wasn't a nice girlie.

  15. Ouch! But that prissy little trollop deserved it. I like your stories. They are unpredictable. ^_^

  16. Great dialogue, excellent voice. Very well written.

  17. The music sets a nice mood, and the painting is beautiful. Also, great dialogue! Edith is a bit unnerving but her paranoia about his phone call is very amusing. Another good one!

  18. That was REALLY good! It was short but damn readable. I know it was because I read it twice...

  19. Great story. The dialogue sung. Loved it.

  20. The last line says it all for me. I'll bet Edith would have served just fine for Sam at one time.

  21. It's alays a treat for me to read these flash stories. You do them so well.. loved it, the music and the painting..well done

  22. Great mood piece. The setting and characters were spot on.

  23. Another atmospheric story, Anthony. Well done, mate.

  24. Your words really captured the posture and expressions of that couple in the painting. Nice snappy dialogue.


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