THE LAST MOMENTS OF PAPA H (flash fiction)

July 2, 1961 at the Finca Vigia, San Francisco de Paula, Cuba.In one breath he thought "Cubans -- how I love these people..."And in the next, Hemingway contemplated an act so very indiscreet.Even with his Pulitzer and Nobel Prizes and a life so accomplished, he felt abandoned by almost everything and everyone around him.Wanting a farewell drink, his nervous elbow knocked the last bottle of whiskey to the ground, shattering it into a beautiful jigsaw...

Read More

REAL DRINKS FOR REAL MEN

VIA REGRETFUL MORNING: Real men drink beer and whiskey. 'Nuff said. When you go to a bar, however, beer all the time can get a bit boring, and you may be looking for something like a strong mixed drink. However, being the manly man you are, you’ve never ordered a mixed drink before, and don’t actually know what drinks are safe to order without risking penile deflation. Worry not, here's a few drinks the manly man.Click HERE.addthis_url=''; addthis_title='';...

Read More

THE USHERETTE (flash fiction)

Lately, I've been inspired by artist Edward Hopper and after writing a Six for his "Automat" painting, I figured I would try my hand at this amazing painting as well.The pictures were changing and the cigar-chomping studio chief told Sally she was yesterday's goods and they wouldn't be needing her on-screen anymore.In a daze, she wandered down Hollywood Boulevard to Grauman's and after crying her eyes out, manager Sully Blizter offered her an ushering...

Read More

FAKER: MAYOR OF NOWEHERE (flash fiction)

Geread was tired of faking it any longer.Somehow he had managed to get himself elected mayor because, of all things, he'd won the grand prize on Jeopardy's Tournament of Champions so, at the time, people thought he was pretty damn smart.Unfortunately, his local community was having a hard time believing him.So here he was, holed up in his office, consumed by unnecessary knowledge of foliage, rare birds and Elizabethan poetry as he paced day in and...

Read More

WOULD-BE WIDOW (flash fiction)

I have a cold. Massive insomnia. Can't breathe, Stuffed. On stupid meds that are keeping me up... This is the result.Josephine and her husband Bill Cummings were married only a year before Uncle Sam tapped his shoulder.The morning he shipped out for basic training, he walked the plank in 'Ra-Ra' fashion and told her, "No matter what happens, keep going... We don't wanna speak German."After two numb years, her daily routine had become almost commonplace...

Read More

THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME (flash fiction)

The Drama Critic hopped aboard his 5 p.m. Manhattan-bound bus just as he did for the past 17 years. This time, though, his usually-boring trip home was different because ousted mayor Julio Taft was sitting next to him.The guy seated in back of the Drama Critic leaned forward and with just enough spittle to make the day more annoying said, “Yo bub, that’s Julio Taft…”The Drama Critic nodded and not thinking much of it, decided to chat up the former...

Read More

HERE’S HOPING GIZMO WON’T BECOME MINCEMEAT (poem)

HERE’S HOPING GIZMO WON’T BECOME MINCEMEAT Walking in, I noticed the sign. The sad sign. A desperate plea. And sort of hopeless. But off all places, I thought. A bar? My bar? This bar. Who would post a lost dog notice on the door? Fuckers in this joint wouldn't know nothing from a lost dog. Take a look inside: We’re three or four rungs above skid row. But forget all that. Out of respect for this Xeroxed 'lil guy staring at me, I read the post;...

Read More

BOOZE ADS ON TV GET YOU EFFED UP QUICKER

FACTOID: "Young men who watched the movie American Pie with accompanying commercials for alcohol were more apt to grab a beer or glass of wine from the refrigerator, compared to those who watched a movie without the drinking prompts."Here's a study that proves this...While we're on the subject... Nuthin' like using a cartoon to sell hooch.addthis_url=''; addthis_title=''; addthis_pub='avenutol...

Read More

GREAT CHEAP BEER

This gem comes courtesy of Men's Style:Chuck Buk would approve of this... It's no shock that nothing tastes better at the end of a long, hard day than cheap beer. Okay, scratch that—just about anything tastes better than cheap beer. But for various reasons—price, convenience, working-class pride (even, or especially, if you're middle-class and in art school)— sometimes nothing beats a budget brew. Here are some favorites — and in an era in which...

Read More

WHEN COOL WAS KING: WHOSE SHOT IS IT? (flash fiction)

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. In this case, 91… This is of my favorite candid Rat Pack pics (I have many). Here’s what I see:“Whose shot is it?” Lawford asked.Dino, just along for the ride, looked around confused and, as usual shrugged his shoulders with that cool aloofness.They were all a bit dazed today since things went a bit late last night. On the “suggestion” of Frank, they all caught the 6 a.m. show at the Sahara’s Casbar Lounge...

Read More

LOCKWOOD AT THE POOL (flash fiction)

James Lockwood had never been to Vegas.Being that he just got hired at his firm - an outfit that peddled all sorts of tin foil - he’d been travelling more now than he ever was used to.So here he was in Sin City hoping to score an account for the hotel’s pillow chocolates and, truth be told, all he had on his mind was a little cabana R&R.At the hotel swimming pool he marveled at the grand scale of the area from the landscaped detail of the foliage...

Read More

NOIR DREAMS (poem)

NOIR DREAMS I imagine snapping the brim of a non-existent fedora after I find the Benny Goodman tape somewhere it shouldn’t be. Only then do I shut my eyes. After a moment, I check the father’s pocket watch and hope the shirt-tail is properly tucked. I do this much after the fact but nevermind that. I’m ready. As I prowl Sunset amidst a sea of Caddie fins and crackly neon, the Benny Goodman stops and reality socks me in the snooker hard with...

Read More

THE GIRL ACROSS THE WAY (poem)

THE GIRL ACROSS THE WAY I’m sitting in this lame eatery, watching her laughing with a couple of friends. She’s sitting in the middle talking to the both of them, flicking her hair. The thing I love is that she smiles as if she knows friggin' nothing about the world. I find it cute in this particular setting. A few minutes later, the bartender gives her a drink, but from where I’m sitting, I can’t tell what it is. Perhaps a beer? Hmmm. She doesn’t...

Read More

OH NO...

The US alcohol market has seen a steep decline in sales and the market has rose the least in the last eight years. Most states are looking directly to hit the alcohol industry and it is estimated that the retail price of alcoholic beverages might increase by as much as 2%. The alcohol industry however isn’t taking this situation lightly.Read more HERE.addthis_url=''; addthis_title=''; addthis_pub='avenutol...

Read More

THANKS TO THE WEB, POETRY IS ON FIRE

Via The Telegraph: Poetry, one of mankind's oldest art forms, is enjoying a resurgence due to the internet, according to the writers themselves. Rather than killing it off, modern technologies like email, social networking sites such as Facebook and online media players are helping poets reach new audiences.The grassroots scene is now growing, with live poetry readings becoming more popular and more poets getting their own pamphlets published.Competitions are also booming: the number of entries for the Foyle Young Poets Award more than doubling...

Read More

WHEN PIGS FLY (flash fiction)

In the land of blues and whiskey, where long necks live and bourbon fills the musty air, there was something ghastly at hand. In the midst of all this beauty known as the devil's music, I never expected to see a bowling pin and a pear do the shuffle.Both beyond drunk, she was in that state of almost ecstasy with the creepy dance stare and he was shimmying a ridiculous horny jive, thinking he might actually have a chance - you know, that thing that...

Read More